There are those who get into their
relationships maturely. They have a vision on what they want to achieve and
when getting in, somewhat from background research and consultation know what
their input ought to be in order for it work. It is sad though when one
realizes that they are not vibrating on the same frequency with their
significant other. Their differences seem to be screaming louder than their
similarities and on realization of the broken chain for the flow of love, they
opt to avoid mending it and walk away having found another play ground that
seems more secure to play on. Mark you I say play on because, if the person that walked away was mature enough
to create a solution together to try and fix the breakage, then it wouldn’t
appear as a play ground but a garden where due to the watering of both parties,
the grass remains green. The temptation of going to greener pasture because
your grass is not watered can be overcome, because you are working together and
are not opponents on different teams trying to beat each other at the same
game.
But after all this is done and the damage
still exists, the truth is, it’s time to heal. Healing is meant to improve you,
not destroy you. It takes time and requires a sense of gentleness on yourself
and also those around you; lest you put your frustrations on those you exist
with like your family, colleagues and friends.
Keep in mind though that as time heals
wounds, it’s only your effort with the help of the Holy Spirit that will
actually bring about the change. Many tend to sit and mourn over the same thing
and get more comfortable mourning than mending. Be careful to go through the
season, and not sit in it. The past is a bondage we all have power over if we
are active enough to indulge in activities that seek to renew our beings and
reposition ourselves for greater things set to come. Philippians 3:13 reminds
us to ‘focus on this one thing:
forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead.’ So yes time
has its part to play... but so do you. Do it!
Through your own lens it may seem that it
will take forever to go away. However the investment you made to love someone
did take time; if you are to go down the same road you’d probably take the same
amount of time to heal from the damage completely. With that in mind, you get
to accept right where you are and who you are as an individual. It’s not about
pretence; for pretence is bound to bring more hurt than what is already there.
It is about laying your cards clean on the table no matter how good or bad the
result may be for you. It’s about looking in the mirror and seeing what is not
right and fixing it. It takes courage for the strong to admit they are weak,
but only one who knows the essence of rebuilding character will do so striving
to regain back what they lost somewhere along the way.
Besides losing the individual that you love
the most, there are many other things that could have been lost in the process,
your identity, your love for God, your passion for the things you were good at
because you were busy trying to change yourself for someone who cared less that
you were doing it all for them... many things are lost in the process and this
is where restoration takes place. To restore
means to ‘bring back into existence’.
This should show you something; not all is lost from within you. There is still
good that lies within you yet to be tapped into and utilised for the glory of
God.
A broken heart can sometimes leave you
feeling dead; there’s a disposition of joy quickly replaced by a season of
tearful despair for some as they try to release the emotions of anger, denial
and for some depression. Truth is, they are understandable. “Love can be as
painful as death,” so I once read and I bet many can identify with that, but
after a while the aftermath after the upshot has to die down and you have to
take charge of your thoughts, your emotions and your actions as well.
Whenever an individual gets wounded, it’s
logic for one to seek for treatment to stop the bleeding and eventually close
the wound. So it’s true even with our hearts. It’s not logic to sit ‘mopping’
around spilled milk. Sooner than later, you have to gather up courage to stop
the ‘bleeding’ and dare to move on believing that greater things are yet to
come.
The following link leads you to the next
blog-post that talks about your period of recovery and basic activities to get
you back on track... Put Me Back Together!
©namwano
Comments
Post a Comment