namwano

Remember the agreement I had made with fear? Yes, it was powerful jotting it down; and I was confident that this energizing moment would revolutionize my life for good. Little did I know that just because I had made a pact, did not mean I would automatically be immune to the fear. Yes, fear could not stay, but my reality brought to the surface that from a distance, fear was waiting on me to come back and get as comfortable as it was before. It was cold outside of me, and the thing with fear, is that it is never really settled on the outside, because you can see it. But once it finds its way to the inner most parts of you, then it knows it has won.  But I have known this kind of space. It is called transition. It is a process that is packed with expectation, anxiety, excitement and sometimes gloom over what you are about to lose- that is transition for you. And because I forced fear to make an exit, I then made room for God and faith to make an entry. He was not just com

I find some prayers in the Bible to be very risky sometimes. There is a scripture that I have over the months of this year come to make as a personal prayer; “Search me Oh God and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there be any offensive way in me and lead me in the way everlasting.” (Psalm 139:23-24) It may be heartfelt when I say it, but some recognizable pride manages to keep me from dethroning myself and having God take center stage of my life. (Grace is sufficient though, says that little voice that attempts to quiet my soul). We have come to understand insecurity as an aspect of life intended to warn us that we are vulnerable to some kind of danger. But there is a kind of insecurity that is internal. We are constantly living in fear of things like failure, rejection, inferiority and lonesomeness. It is a state in which our lack of confidence is looming more than our faith. We always feel “small” and “incapable”. But I guess it all boils down to